A Gibbleguts.com Science Exclusive

History Re-Written
The Scientific American journal reported this week that a Himalayan rabbit herder has inadvertently stumbled across the remains of what anthropologists believe to be a prehistoric nerd. Preliminary carbon dating tests place the frozen geek at between 80 and 100,000 years old. If true, these new facts directly contradict the earlier belief that nerds weren’t in existence until the homosapian era, some 50,000 years later.

Diet
Skid mark scrapings taken from his undershorts revealed that the Jurassic geek lived on a diet consisting mainly of monkey brains, and a strange beverage that can be best described as a crude form of today’s ‘Zima’ beverage. Which incidentally, is still popular among modern-day nerds.

Breeding
Scientist speculate that these early nerds rarely mated. It is still unclear as to why, but experts speculate that it could have something to do with their extreme dorkyness making them undesirable to other hominid species.